Q. I desperately need help. I am based in the UK. I have OCD. This manifests itself in 3 ways.
First, I take long in the toilet, making ghusl and wudhu, i.e. washing my hands incessantly.
Second, every verbal utterance by me or my wife is dissected and analysed for kufr. I ask approximately 10 muftis for a fatwa because I want to be 100% sure. Inevitably, asking so many muftis results in 1 out of 10 concluding kufr. My negative mindset precludes me from focusing on the 9 in favour. This has happened on 3 occasions. For example just yesterday my wife was reading a message on facebook part of which said: “thank you Allah for making my samosas turn out the right shape.” When she finished reading the message she said: “trust her to come out with crap.” 4 muftis said no kufr but the one inconclusive fatwa is what my mind is entrenched with.
Another example is of a conversation I had with my father wherein I stated: “I told Sajid that I am willing to help the Masjid out in confidence provided my employer doesn’t come to know. If, however, you mention my name to them I will screw you over and I don’t give a damn then that the masjid is involved.” The intention here was not to disrespect the masjid but to threaten the brother.
Mufti Siraj Desai (South Africa) and Mufti of (Zimbabwe) and Mufti of (Darul Ifta Birmingham UK) concluded that this did not constitute kufr but my anxiety levels are such that I cannot rest until the remaining muftis all come back and conclude the same.
Third whenever I am given naseehat by my wife in particular such anger and anti Islamic sentiments grip my heart that it feels like I have left the fold of Islam. Muftis have suggested seeing a psychiatrist. I am reluctant to see a non-muslim psychiatrist yet I cannot find a reliable Muslim psychiatrist in the UK. I am gradually falling in to a state of depression bordering on the suicidal. My marriage is up and down and I am completely lost. I am irregular with Salah and my akhlaaq rapidly oscillates from the sublime to the disgraceful. I have been sitting in bed all day doing absolutely nothing. The month of Ramadhan is passing by and I an pre-occupied with obtaining fatwas regarding whether such and such statement constitutes kufr. Please provide a solution. Even whilst writing this, I initially wrote please help me as opposed to please provide a solution. Now I am wondering whether asking help from another besides Allah constitutes disbelief.
Please suggest a cure and confirm that there is no need to renew Iman and re-perform nikah.
A. There is no doubt that you are suffering from a dangerous type of waswasa which probably may actually lead to the destruction of your Iman. Shaitaan is playing with your mind, and you are giving him the chance to do so.
Your first problem is that you are bringing many unnecessary questions in your mind, and the other problem is that when you receive answers for your questions (from authoritative scholars), you begin to have doubts in their answers. If you continue in this manner, you will ruin yourself.
You need to take control of your self, do whatever you are commanded to do as a Muslim, and refrain from prying into every small and insignificant matter that comes to your mind. If you cannot control them, then recite a lot of Ta’awuz (that is, say A’uzu billahi Minash Shaitanir Rajeem) frequently, until these thoughts go away.
Secondly, ignore whatever comes to your mind (from among these evil whispers). Pay no heed to it, and give it no importance.
Thirdly, if you think that some of these thoughts are such that you need to seek a fatawa, then communicate with such a Mufti (Islamic scholar) upon whom you have reliance and confidence, and accept what he says. Do not go about ‘scouting’ for opinions, for this will only put you in a state of confusion.
With respect to asking questions while seeking help, this is something which Allah Has (himself) asked us to do when he said, ‘And ask those who know if you do not know’. Allah Has also ordered us by saying ‘And help each other in goodness and in piety’.
In order to cure the problem of waswasa, you should also frequently recite the dua which Allah has given in the Holy Quran when one is touched and affected by Shaitan. This Dua is :-
‘Rabbi A’uzu bika min Hamazaatish Shayateen wa A’uzu bika Rabbi An Yahdhuroon’.
‘O my lord I seek refuge in you from the whispers of the devils. And I seek refuge in you, O my lord, from their presence.
Strictly adhere to the performance of your Salaah, stay away from all the haram, and supplicate to Allah and follow the guidelines that I have given. Insha Allah, Allah will remove your problem.
And Allah knows best.
Mufti Waseem Khan