QUESTION: Assalaam Alaikum Wa Rahamatullhi Wa Barakatuhu…
A husband and wife are to live separately for six or so months after nikah due to visa and other problems. Both husband and wife are sexually excited after just hearing each other’s voices on the phone or during video chatting. In this case is it permissible to release the building sexual tension by masturbation if it becomes unbearable? Note that the two are living in separate countries and it will take a while for the ruksati to be done with.
Wa Alaikum Assalaam,
الجواب بالله و التوقيف
Masturbation is haram (unlawful) and must not be done. The only concession which has been given is where a male is about to fall into ‘Zina’ and the only thing that can stop him is to release the sexual tension by Masturbating so that it stops him from Zina (fornication/adultery). It is not really an allowance to do something haram, but it is doing the lesser of the two evils.
Since both of you know that it will take some time before ruksati is done, you should avoid such things which can cause such excitement. To decrease the building of such sexual tension in a male, the Prophet (صلي الله عليه و صلم) has advised the youths to fast. This should be done to control such feelings.
While writing on the harms of masturbation, the great Scholar, Shaikh Abdullah Naasih Al Ulwaan, wrote in his wonderful book, ‘Tarbiyatul Awlaad’, ‘A person who masturbates becomes weak and thin, and is liable to tremble. Palpitation increase. Memory becomes weak. Impotency is the natural outcome of masturbation. A boy who has indulged in the habit of masturbation is not capable of marriage when he grows up. If he does marry, his wife hates him, and often, husband and wife divorces. A person who masturbates is a psychological case, and is liable to serious mental illness like forgetfulness, loss of memory, weak determination, laziness and lethargy.
The act of masturbation is despicable. It is a grave sin and unlawful. On the Day of Judgement, the hands of those who masturbate will become pregnant. Such people are punished in this world too. They will be deprived of the mercy of Allah, Most High.
It is forbidden to use whatever is injurious and harmful, yet, under certain circumstances, masturbation may be overlooked if done to protect oneself from adultery and illegitimate acts.’ (Tarbiyatul Awlaad).
And Allah Knows Best.
Mufti Waseem Khan.